As a teen, managing your mental health can be hard. Sometimes, it can be even harder to open up about your experiences. However, telling others about your thoughts, feelings and behaviors is vital to getting help. Self-harm is a serious issue, and it should not be faced alone. Are you thinking about telling your parents that you self-harm? Starting the conversation can take a lot of courage, but it can be an important step toward finding a solution. If you are having suicidal thoughts, it is essential that you seek support immediately. Call or text 988, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, for immediate support. In addition, suicide prevention programs for teens can offer the help you need to overcome suicidality.

Are you wondering how to talk to your parents about self-harm or another mental health challenge? This step-by-step guide can help you start the discussion and work toward a productive outcome. Our guide can help you feel confident as you take the next step toward improving your mental health.

Starting a conversation with your parents about self-harm

Many teenagers who are experiencing a mental health challenge such as self-harm or suicidal ideation find it difficult to talk to their parents about it. Some worry their parents will judge them or think less of them. Others might fear they won’t be taken seriously. It can also be hard to put into words exactly what you’re feeling. Some teens don’t want to burden their parents, while others may fear that their parents will overreact or punish them. 

Your parents can provide immediate care and help you take the necessary steps to ensure your safety. They can arrange for professional help, such as therapists, counselors or psychiatrists, who can provide treatment and support. A discussion about your mental health can help open communication between you and your parents and strengthen your relationship.

We know it can be hard to talk about your feelings, but there’s so many good things that can come from it. As you think about talking to your parents, consider these tips:

• Choose a good time — Telling your parents about your self-harm will likely involve a serious conversation. For a productive discussion, try to find a time when your parents are available and you can get their full attention. Setting is also important. Try to pick a time when you are all in a comfortable, private space like your home.

• Be direct — Honesty is key. You do not need to share every detail, but it is important to be direct and tell your parents about your behaviors. While speaking directly can be difficult, it is crucial that your parents know what you are going through. Your honesty can enable them to offer the support you need.

• Explain why you want to talk — Let your parents know that you are looking for help and support. When you first tell your parents that you have hurt yourself, they may have emotional reactions. Make it clear that you are not trying to shock them or make them sad. Instead, it can be beneficial to focus on how you value their support. Look toward the future and try to center the discussion on solutions.

Does speaking to your parents in person feel too difficult? Sending a text may be an easier option. Texting your parents allows you to prepare your words and start a conversation without needing to worry about immediate reactions. Here’s an example of a good text to open the conversation:

“Hey Mom/Dad, I need to talk to you about something important, but it’s hard for me to talk about it out loud. I’ve been struggling with self-harm and I need help. Can we talk about this more at home tonight?”

How to stop yourself from self-harm: Top treatment options to mention

Want to bring up the possibility of treatment to your parents? Here are some solutions you can mention:

• Therapy — If you have not received any treatment for your mental health, therapy can be an excellent start. Evidence-based approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) are designed to help you understand and manage your feelings and behaviors. Working with a licensed, qualified therapist, you can learn to avoid self-harming behaviors and build healthier coping skills.

• Support groups — Joining a support group can help you connect with peers who have gone through similar experiences. With peer support, you can get a confidence boost as you make progress on your mental wellness journey.

• Intensive outpatient treatment — When other treatment strategies prove ineffective, it may be time to look for more rigorous options. Intensive outpatient programs (IOPs) are designed to offer structured, comprehensive support through a treatment plan that integrates multiple therapies and modalities.

“Why do I hurt myself?”: Leading reasons behind self-harm

Before you talk to your parents, it may be helpful to understand self-harm a bit better. This knowledge can help you explain it to your parents. Self-harm, sometimes called self-injury, is when someone intentionally hurts themselves. Cutting, burning and hitting oneself are all examples of self-harming acts. People self-harm for many different reasons. Common reasons include:

• Emotional release
• Self-punishment
• Feelings of numbness

These reasons are generally signs of an underlying mental health condition that should be treated. Many teens struggle with self-harm. You are not alone. With the right support, many teens have successfully made progress and overcome self-harming behaviors. 

Embrace U can help address self-harming behaviors

Telling your parents that you self-harm is a brave step on the journey toward lasting mental wellness. When you’re ready to seek treatment beyond regular outpatient therapy, Embrace U is here to help. Our expert team offers compassionate care through outpatient treatment options tailored to the needs of each individual patient.

Contact our team today for more information or to schedule an initial appointment.